By Dr. D.A. Palmer
In our journey to understand and support our children's unique qualities, I want to propose that we embrace the term "exceptionally wired" instead of the traditional term "neurodivergent." I acknowledge that neurodivergence is a common and useful term that is becoming more widely used to describe conditions such as ADHD, Autism, dyslexia, etc. But I also know that by reframing our language, we can shift the focus from differences to highlighting the exceptional qualities that make each child special. In this blog, we will explore the significance of using the term "exceptionally wired" in my Thriving Resilience Model and its impact on fostering a positive self-image, inclusivity, and celebrating every child's individual journey.
Understanding the Concept:
When we say that children are "exceptionally wired," we acknowledge that they have unique strengths and potential that stem from various factors. These factors include genetics, environmental influences, developmental aspects, early childhood experiences, natural neurological differences, or even societal perceptions based on individual and cultural beliefs. Rather than viewing these differences as deficits, disorders, or disabilities, we choose to see them as diverse wiring that contributes to the rich tapestry of humanity.
For instance, consider your child who demonstrates exceptional artistic abilities since they were young. They have an extraordinary talent for painting and a unique perspective that allows them to create captivating pieces of art. I have a child just like this. This child's exceptional wiring in the realm of artistic expression sets them apart from their peers.
Instead of viewing this child as neurodivergent or defined by a diagnosis or disability, which may carry a connotation of being different or outside the norm, we choose to celebrate their exceptional wiring. By recognizing their exceptional artistic abilities, we can provide the necessary support and opportunities to nurture their talent further.
When we say that children are "exceptionally wired," we acknowledge that they have unique strengths and potential that stem from various factors.
Imagine how this perspective fosters their growth, encourages self-confidence, and allows them to thrive in their artistic journey. All because we are embodying the term "exceptionally wired.”
The Power of Language:
Our choice of words is a powerful tool that can either empower or marginalize our kids. By using the term "exceptionally wired," we aim to inspire and motivate you and others to recognize and nurture the exceptional potential in children. This positive language deeply reinforces a sense of pride and self-worth, helping them develop a positive self-image that will impact their overall well-being now and into the future.
Promoting Inclusivity:
Inclusivity lies at the heart of my purpose and mission. By embracing the term "exceptionally wired," we all can create a more relatable and inclusive space for all children and their families. This terminology recognizes that neurodiversity is a natural part of the human experience and that it should be celebrated rather than stigmatized. It encourages us to see their children as unique individuals with their own strengths, irrespective of societal norms or expectations.
Would I love to see these norms and expectations changed. I work for it everyday. But I can’t do it alone. That’s why we need a collective—a group of like-minded individuals who come together with a shared purpose, pooling their resources, skills, and efforts to achieve a common goal or create meaningful change. In this case, advocating for and building inclusive spaces for all!
Shifting the Focus:
One of the key benefits of using the term "exceptionally wired" is the shift in focus from differences to strengths. Rather than perceiving neurodivergence as a limitation, we encourage parents to explore and appreciate the exceptional qualities their children possess. This shift in perspective enables us to tap into the vast potential that lies within each child, helping them thrive in their own unique way.
Nurturing Individual Journeys:
Every child's journey is unique, and as parents, it is our responsibility to provide a nurturing environment that supports their growth and development. By using the term "exceptionally wired," we emphasize the importance of individuality and acknowledge that each child requires tailored support to reach their full potential.
How Do We Practically Do This?
Here are five simple steps you can take to apply the concepts discussed in this blog in your home today:
1. Embrace and Use Positive Language: Start by using positive and empowering language when talking about or talking to your child highlighting their unique qualities and potential. Celebrate these qualities often in authentic and empowering ways. We can be tempted to want to point out the flaws when our child is struggling or making life challenging. Resist and replace with positive and affirming talk.
2. Foster a Supportive Environment: Create a nurturing and inclusive environment at home where your child feels valued and supported. Encourage open communication, active listening, and empathy to promote a sense of belonging and acceptance. These are challenging actions for us as adults, so be mindful during the critical moments of connection.
3. Focus on Strengths: Shift your focus from perceived differences to your child's exceptional strengths. Take the time to identify and appreciate their unique talents and abilities, and provide opportunities for them to explore and develop those strengths further. In fact, engage together with them in this exploration and discovery by engaging in their favorite activities.
4. Connect with a Community: I know it’s cliche but it does take a village to raise a child. Seek out and connect with a supportive community of like-minded parents and organizations who embrace and affirm neurodiversity. Join online forums or local support groups where you can share experiences, gain insights, and find inspiration from others who are on a similar journey.
5. Advocate for Inclusivity: Take an active role in advocating for inclusivity and acceptance of neurodiversity in your home, school, and community. You don’t need to create big signs or massive movements to do this. But you do need to raise your voice. Educate others about the importance of embracing differences and promoting a positive mindset towards exceptional wiring.
By implementing these simple steps, you can create a home environment that celebrates neurodiversity, nurtures your child's unique potential, and fosters a sense of belonging and acceptance. Remember, every small action you take can make a significant impact on your child's journey towards thriving and resilience.
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In Closing
The term "exceptionally wired" offers a refreshing perspective on neurodiversity, one that focuses on celebrating the unique strengths and potential of every child. By embracing this language, we encourage a positive self-image, inclusivity, and a deep appreciation for the individual journey of each child. Let us work hard to create a world where diversity is valued, differences are celebrated, and every child's exceptional wiring is nurtured and celebrated. Let’s not settle for anything less. Together, we can empower our children to thrive and reach their full potential.
A Thought to Ponder:
As we embrace the exceptional wiring of our children, let’s be reminded that true strength lies not in conformity, but in the celebration of our diverse and vibrant tapestry of humanity.
A Question for Reflection:
How can you continue to foster an home environment that empowers your children to thrive, not despite, but because of their exceptional qualities?
How important is it to your child to use positive and affirming language?
0%Extremely important and it makes a big difference
0%I want to use more positive language but need more help
0%I believe in being forthright with my child—positive or not
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